264- FINALS WEEK: DAY 4

DONE. Turned in my final paper this morning for history and have pretty much spent all day goofing off seeing people. Went climbing outside, slacklining, and just overall screwing around. I'm not sure what's going on this evening, so I'm working on this while I figure out what's happening. Options are somewhat limited when nearly everyone has gone home.

This is my last post under this blog. I'll have a new one set up for the summer, then set up a different one for next school year.

I guess this is where I actually talk about what I learned throughout the course of the school year. Strangely, most of what I have acquired seem to be ways of processing and viewing information rather than the information itself. I couldn't tell you most of the tidbits of information that I have gleaned from my American History course. But when I can look at newspaper articles and figure out the different paradigms used by countries for their foreign policy, I get really excited, because it's really interesting.

But what about me? What has changed about me since I've been here? Not only in terms of beliefs and perspectives, but also in personality?

We'll do the positive aspects first. I have really come to love the outdoors and such related activities. I have always been an active person, constantly needing something to do to avoid boredom, but when there's something about waking up "early" to hit the trail to a bouldering route when just about everyone around you is still asleep or hung over from the happenings of the night before. It's a great way to communicate with my Maker, have genuine hangouts and good conversations with people, just being in stuff that's really cool to look at. I had the thought today that everything in nature somehow reflects God's character. Pretty cool stuff.

Second, I have embraced my natural extravert a lot more. Sometimes I tend to be really mellow when I first meet people, but it's so much more fun to leave an impression on someone. For example. It's gotta be more fun to meet someone with a whole cupcake shoved in their mouth than someone who simply offers a half-wave and a "Hi, I'm Brandon." Yeah, I've freaked a few people out, but that's ok. Spring quarter was really fun for a few reasons, one of which was my natural tendency to meet people, which meant that I saw people I knew all the time, and I wasn't scared to look them in the eyes and high-five them every time I saw them. The sun helped too, but a rainy day is more bearable if you have people with whom to hole up and watch movies.

Third, I can honestly say my faith in God has deepened. This is pretty much the coolest thing ever, to know that God's got the helm and my trying to take it from him isn't going to help anything, but rather lead to my driving into a hillside. I've also realized the importance of memorization. There's that whole AWANA bit, which is cool, but I've honestly forgotten almost all of those verses. When you're seven years old, all you know is that if you learn this phrase, you get points. The goal is not a deeper understanding of Christ and the tools to defend yourself from Satan's flaming arrows, but rather to win a series of games to obtain bragging rights and candy. You aren't moved by the eloquence of a Psalm, nor appreciate Solomon's candid words on life as it is, nor feel pushed by Paul's constructive criticism and encouragement. That kind of appreciation comes with age and the ability to understand how it benefits you. And I've finally reached that point. Finally. 21 years in the making.

Ok, so there's some things I need to work on as well. This may sound really strange, but the main thing is self-confidence. I've always been scared to rock the boat, to go out on a limb and say things that aren't popular or appreciated. But I think it goes deeper than that. Sometimes I genuinely feel that no one cares about what I have to say, which is, of course, a lie. I feel I lack the skill to clearly communicate the knowledge and ideas I have amassed, which is a bit more on the correct side of things. In addition, I feel as though I use following Jesus as a cop-out to having goals or dreams for my future, because I lack the confidence or know-how to really pursue anything. When stuff gets harder, I generally just quit and figure it's not worth the stress. Of course, the Bible clearly teaches otherwise (I mentioned this in an Ecclesiastes post about 2 weeks ago, though Ecc. also teaches that it's "like chasing the wind") I realized this was a bigger problem than I thought when I met with a Resident Director who was the leader of my small group in the ResLife class I had to take. When I asked how she knew that I struggled with this, she simply smiled and said that some people with confidence issues over-compensate in hopes that no one will notice. Not to say that I have an ego, but I definitely see that over-compensation in my personality. Self-confidence is going to be critical in my job next year, which is why it's a "project" of mine over the summer.

Otherwise: I have had SUCH an amazing year. I have a good base of friends, and there are some that I will miss terribly. Lots of amazing adventures happened. Spending hours at Larrabee State Park, incredible sunsets, good conversations, aching muscles and late nights. Rolling down the hill on the way to Haggen, as well as playing tag in said establishment. Slackline in the rain and in below-freezing temperatures. That really fun drop into 2-3 ft of fresh snow at Mt Baker. Chillin' with my biological (and Christian) brother Evan and Christian brother Simon when they came up to visit. Really bad puns, high-fives, and doing cartwheels and handstands in the dining hall. Trying to slide a hurdle on the football field with a snowboard and a tow-rope. Jumping off stuff and wondering why I'm still in one piece. The first -and only decent- Bad Writing Night. Griping about dining hall food and eating it anyway.

Lots of memories, and I'm sure I'm still missing so many.

To anyone at Western that reads this, thank you, because you're amazing.

It is now 1:10 AM on Friday, which means I'm supposed to be up, showered, awake, caffeinated (I made it all week!) and driving in 7 hours.

My summer posts will be here. They may be few and far between because I won't always have access to a computer and will be out of town a fair amount.

Until then, thanks so much for sticking with me, and I hope you read my future posts.

-Brandon

263-FINALS WEEK: DAY 3

Oh my. Today was interesting. I was up and moving by 9:00, did some reading, mailed a letter, tried to study, went to lunch, turned in a paper, hung out, took a final, had dinner, hung out some more and now I'm here, really tired for some reason.

Highlight of my day: Being done with the one final that I actually had to go to. I had both of the papers due this week done, at least mostly, but that stupid scheduled final...grr. But now it's done, and I'm thankful for it. I returned from dinner to find a new slackline laying on my bed, courtesy my amazing friend Meagan. It's really fun, because it's half the width of the one I already had. I threw a bit of a fit, then realized that I should just accept it. So I did. And it's awesome.

Walked around being goofy for awhile, and now I'm really hungry. I just have to turn in that one last final paper tomorrow morning...

AH I am so close. I'm to the point I just want to be done so I can have fun and not worry about stuff.

I leave here in less than 48 hours...wow.

262-FINALS WEEK: DAY 2

Finished both of my papers today, except for a quick proof read on one of them after I've given myself a day to not think about it. Otherwise, I hung out a lot. That was my Tuesday. I learned a few Bob Dylan songs on the guitar, all I need now is a harmonica and a fedora.

I'm feeling really good. Very at-peace. I just have one final left tomorrow at 3:30 PM, so I should probably go over my notes at some point.

Sometimes I feel like a terrible student. Right now, I'll chalk it up to being super burnt out. I can't imagine what next year will be like.

261- FINALS WEEK: DAY 1

I have yet to do anything scholarly today. I woke up, made tea, and ventured down to North Campus for quiet time and lunch. I then went to a meeting with my small group leader for the ResLife class that I had to take to be a Resident Advisor next year. It was good to talk to her outside of a classroom setting.

I just got back from climbing again, and I'm pretty wiped out.

Yeah. Not much else to say here.

I have a paper I should probably work on. After dinner....

260

Church in the morning, brunch at the dining hall, and I honestly was going to go on about a 10 mile hike, but I got to the trailhead, pulled out my bag then thought "Do I seriously want to walk 10 miles right now?"

"No."

Then I went climbing down at Larrabee State Park.

Got back on campus at about 3:00, was bored, hung out for awhile, then went to the library to finish up on my history paper. I now have eight pages worth of material: it's revision time.

Dinner, and now I'm here, listening to Brad Paisley and thinking about going outside for awhile, although the weather looks like it's taking a turn for the worst and I don't want to go outside just to get rained on. I'll have to venture out later for a sunset, but right now my back is sore.

Make tea and play the guitar? I think I might.

I should note that I had coffee at church this morning. But I promise I'll make it through this week without it.

Gas is up to $4.50 a gallon up here. Just thought I'd tell you. I'm guessing $5 by the end of the summer.

259

Interesting day. I got up at a decent hour to work on a paper, and did pretty well. I now have about seven of eight pages typed, plus I have yet to write an introduction or conclusion. In addition, I began my other 5-7 page paper, and should have that one done by Monday evening. At least that's my goal.

Having completed school work for the day, I went to a local music store with some friends. I was only in there for about 20 min before I was ready to run out screaming. Not that the store was a bad place, but it reminded me of my days in retail, and also of my inability to play a nice guitar without wanting to put it on my account. I like my 30 year old acoustic, but it's not a Taylor or a Larrivee.

This evening, I went down to Boulevard Park for the first time as a Western student, and didn't think it was as cool as everyone tells me it is. Yeah, it's got the water and such which is something that it has going for it. But there aren't as many interesting people to watch as at Esther Short, and it just doesn't have the same eclectic vibe that Esther Short does. Meh. It's cool.

Watched Zoolander for about the 5th time this year, and I really like that movie. It gets funnier everytime.

Walked back to the folks in the dorms hollaring, obviously sloshed. Even walking past a few folks that looked as though they were no strangers to partying, they looked at me, shifted their eyes towards the noise, and muttered "Crazy." I hear they will be back up in Beta/Gamma next year, which is where I am placed. So I'll have to learn to deal with drunk people. Fun. I feel like I've learned a lot even being up here.

SO I'm sorta tired. Tomorrow should be interesting. I still haven't heard if I made the CTK worship team, though at this point I am kind of doubting that I made it. Honestly, that's adding to what stress level I have left.

Oh. Read Galations today. Paul really wasn't happy with them...

258

I'm sitting in the Viking Union watching a sunset. Or, at least the clouds in front of the sunset. It's actually kinda cool. It makes the clouds just on the horizon look like they're on fire. Oh, how I love sunsets. I find myself missing the wintertime sunrises over the hills back home, with the flourescent pink and oranges, telltale signs that it's a day to stay inside.

It was actually this afternoon. After a morning of rain, it was great to have blue skies that I miss so much, even if it was only for a few hours. My stress levels went down significantly today. Starting things really does help. I'm about five pages into my eight-page Soviet History paper, and I'm actually enjoying writing this one. If I play my cards right, I can be done with both papers by Monday evening, which would be rad. Neither of them are due until Wednesday, and one is due Thursday, but I am honestly just sick of thinking about them. And I have to do well on my Wednesday afternoon final, so I'll hopefully be able to have a good chunk of time to devote to that. If the weather keeps hating Bellingham, studying shouldn't be a problem.

Hopefully it'll be somewhat nice on Sunday. It'd be nice to get out at least one more time before the end of the year.

I leave a week from today. That's scary. I have a feeling tonight's gonna be a wild one on the Ridge though.

257

I went to the rock wall again today. I pushed myself really hard, and now my arms hurt. Funny how that works.

Today was interesting. I don't get stressed out pretty much ever, so it was weird to get through half the day with a crazy constricted feeling around my eyes and an aching head. I did start a paper though, which alleviated a bit of the stress, and I went and found people to hang out with, which also helped a lot. Climbing was fun too and helped me regain part of my sanity.

I've made the decision to not drink coffee until after finals week. I had it three days in a row and I feel myself needing it. Stupid addiction. I will not be mastered by anything.

I was reading in 1st Corinthians today, and I got to chapter 7, and read it like eight times. When I got to the part about married people not having self control and how it's better to remain single, I got really confused. I had read it before, but I never really grasped the implications. Paul seems to seriously be telling people not to get married. I know that men and women were created to be together, a metaphor and symbol of the union between Christ and his church. One needs the other in order for humanity to survive. That's just how it works.

Any insight on this?

Tomorrow is Friday. Which means that a week from then, I will be packing up and moving back to Vancouver for the summer. I think that's the real stressor. Leaving and saying goodbye to people that I have seen everyday for the last 9 months.

256

Really quickly before I have to run to class...

Psalm 49:16-19

16 Do not be afraid when a man becomes rich, when the glory of his house in increased; 17 For when he dies he will carry nothing away; his glory will not descend after him. 18 Though while he lives to congratulate himself- and though men praise you when you do well for yourself - 19 He shall go to the generation of his fathers; They shall never see the light.

The end of verse 17 is interesting, because it's assuming they will descend. I may be reading too far into this, but remember the whole "camel through the eye of a needle" thing?

The phrasing of verse 18 was really cool too.

Ok, I have to go to class.

255-And the Rain Returns

I woke up this morning to a popularity spike: two text messages and one voicemail. Popularity spikes are fun.

This morning, I looked out my window and saw rain falling. Of course, it doesn't matter that it's June and supposed to be sunny. I have about a week and a half to go of school, and I'm just sick of doing school. This doesn't include that I have a certain stressor that's driving me nuts. I spent my early afternoon in the Underground Coffeehouse laying on a couch trying to forget that it was Dead Week, then my early evening reading a book for my Soviet history class.

I am a huge Switchfoot fan. They are tied for #1 on my favorites list with the Eagles, and I actually listen to them more these days than I listen to the Eagles. On rainy days such as this one, I really dwell on their album Nothing is Sound. I know I've talked about it before, but I just love it. It's not one of their better albums, but it fits days like today perfectly. When the weather isn't working the way I want it to, I am thinking about life way more than I should, and I'm walking by myself in the rain a lot, this album captures the mood perfectly. I listened to this one a lot today.

Later in the day, I met with a friend, who introduced me to the Open Mic night at the Underground, which is really funny, because it's the last one of the year. It was about what I expected, which is why I hadn' gone as of late. There were a few good acts, though, and a few that just deserve props for doing what they did: it takes guts to play techno-ish whatnot to a college crowd in Bellingham.

There was one, though, that was so vulgar that I couldn't believe that the sound guy kept him going. To the sound guy's credit, he did turn him off momentarily, but the guy kept going with his grossness. I was proud to be able to stand up with my friend, leave, and not feel like I was doing the guy an injustice: it was that terrible.

I feel as though I should talk about something a bit more important, but my brain is fried with life's happenings. I hope I mellow out here soon, because having my brain on overload sucks.

254

As I was wandering about today, in my travels I began to think about some pretty strange things.

One of which was: people don't talk in elevators.

This is really funny to me, because I am usually looking to strike up a conversation anywhere, and an elevator is no exception. But when standing in an elevator, everyone faces the door and gives off a distinct vibe that says "don't talk to me. We're in an elevator."

Why is this?

There are other things as well that just puzzle me, and I'll never know the answers.

Why do girls need so many shoes, and why can't they wear the same prom dress two years in a row?

How come we park in driveways, yet drive on parkways?

Why does hair grow in our armpits?

Why are yawns contagious?

*shrug*

I'm sure there are more of these things that my wiped-out mind can't grab right now.

253- Happy June

Once again, weekends in Bellingham are amazing. I spent Friday, Saturday, and Sunday out hanging with friends outside. My body is really tired, and it'll take a few days of rest to get feeling solid again. Friday and Saturday I caught some incredible sunsets. May I never take another one for granted. I'm currently sipping on a cup of coffee and listening to music.

I've been thinking about this whole blogging thing. I have noticed a distinct lack of comments, which could mean a few things: One, my writing sucks. Two, I'm writing about things that aren't interesting to anyone. Three, I'm offending people. I'm guessing that it's a combination of all three things.

I want to apologize to anyone I've offended. I'm forever done talking about politics, at least on blogger. Things seem to stay a bit more cival when these discussions take place in person.

Awhile back, I discussed a bad habit of mine, specifically swearing. I am happy to say that while this habit persists, it's gotten MUCH better (I've been hanging out with a different crowd recently...funny what that'll do.) Within the context of this discussion, the issue of anger was brought up. I have since talked to a few individuals about this topic, and I get a general vibe that anger is "bad." Whether it's sin or not has not been pinned down. While the word "anger" has a negative conotation, I feel as though there are a few different elements to it that make it "right" or "wrong." The first: what are you angry about? The second: How long did it take you to get there?

I might take this moment to remind people that God himself, while DEFINITELY loving, merciful, and full of grace is capable of anger. There's a ton of evidence of that in the Old Testament. He leveled the earth with the flood and started over. When Korah rebelled against Moses in Numbers 16, Moses became angry, and God answered that anger by opening up the earth and swallowing Korah and his followers. As far as New Testament, Jesus took out his anger on the pharisees and merchants in the temple.

Anger is biblical. It's also an emotion. I would argue that to some extent it's healthy. But what makes it healthy? As I said previously, what are you angry about?

When Moses became angry with Korah, it was because the authority God had given him had been challenged. What's interesting about this is that Moses doesn't do much. He leaves it to God to say who's in charge. God responds to this by destroying all of Korah's family.

Jesus took out his anger on the merchants in Matthew 21:12-13 by casting them out and overturning their tables. Why? They were defiling his house. It was supposed to be a house of prayer, and it had been turned into a "den of thieves." I'd say that's a legitimate reason for anger.

A bad reason to be angry: being unable to complete a bouldering route while rock climbing.

Again, the other element involved here is how long it takes someone to get angry, and not only that, but how long they stayed angry. After Jesus cast out all the merchants and moneychangers in the temple, what did he do? In v.14, IMMEDIATELY afterward, he goes back to healing people.

We know that God himself is a "God of forgiveness, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, and abounding in lovingkindness." (Nehemiah 9:17b)

Psalm 30:5 says "For His anger is but for a moment, his favor is for a lifetime..."

So God himself feels anger. He can't be in the presence of sin, so we can logically conclude that anger itself is not a sin. HOWEVER. What is the object of the anger? Is it the name of the LORD being defiled or questioned, or anger at the 6 year old kid screaming bloody murder at the sight of a garter snake at a lake, or something dumb like a rock that is hard to hang onto?
As a result, I feel as though anger should be a rarity, because it really isn't worth it to get riled up about the things that we do. I also feel as though the take home message is don't let anger control you, because that's when the line gets fuzzy. Anger's rise must be controlled, and if it doesn't fade quickly, the red-zone has once again been reached. Really dumb things have been said when anger is involved, and really dumb decisions have been made under it's influence as well.

250!

Today, I decided, should be reserved as a rest day for my once-again aching body. I should probably stretch a bit more often.

I have been by myself for most of the day, and I'm a little bummed out about it. It's kind of a gross day, so I'm not as excited as I should be. I do have the weekend to look forward to, though, so I am looking forward to three solid adventures (yet to be planned, mind you, but they will happen.)

I gave my testimony at Core last night. It was kind of exciting, but I wish I had gone a bit deeper and talked about some of the struggles I've had. Honestly, they've almost all been mental up until now. I did get to express my love for the book of Ecclesiastes and read a chunk towards the end where things seem to get a bit happier. I got a couple funny looks when I talked about how much I liked the book, perhaps because it was unfamiliar, and perhaps because it's sort of depressing in parts. I, on the other hand, find it totally refreshing that one of the wisest men ever to set foot on this dustball we call earth recognized that life sucks a lot of the time and that our relationship with God is all that matters.

I especially love chapter 11: 9-10.

9 Rejoice, young man, during your childhood, and let your heart be pleasant during the days of young manhood. And follow the impulses of your heart and the desires of your eyes. Yet know that God will bring you to judgement for all these things (I LOVE the eternal perspective!) 10 So, remove vexation from your heart and put away pain from your body, because childhood and the prime of life are fleeting.

This can seem depressing from one perspective. "Awe, man, the prime of my life is fleeting!"

But from my perspective: That's right now! I am actually told to follow my heart and my eyes, as long as these things are honoring to God.

SO cool.

I'm a little tired right now, hopefully that'll pass soon enough. Like I said, I'm gearing up for the weekend.

248 Written in the Wee-Morning Hours of 249

I'm sorta burnt out. I didn't sleep well last night, and I'm still rebounding from the fullness of the weekend. I'm sort of stressed and the tension I cited last week seems to have returned. I think I need another sunny-day adventure. They seem to make everything better, at least for awhile.

Getting about halfway through my history reading for tomorrow, I decided that I couldn't read anymore, then went out to watch the sunset.

Sunsets to me are a glimpse into what this world was supposed to be like before we went and mucked it up.

247

So, today is Memorial Day. It's also kind of disgusting outside. Which means that I am taking advantage of having the room to myself and watching Band of Brothers while my muscles rest from seven straight days of climbing and being active. It's hard to do, yes, but it's necessary to ensure that I can continue climbing and adventuring. Thankfully, it's sort of raining, so I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. I may pull my slackline out a bit later, though.

Returning to the day at hand, I keep thinking of these lyrics from a Blue Scholars song

America romanticize the old war story
Heroes, ammo, guns, blood, guts and glory

Part of me views this day as a creation of our government in order to continue that tradition, and to some extent, I'm sure that it's so.

The other part of me is filled with gratitude and appreciation that there are those who think that their country is worth dying for. A standing army (or at least the ability to defend itself) is a huge part of what makes a nation what it is: it has to protect it's own sovereignty to ensure stability. We owe this relative stability to the people who signed up to be a part of this defense, and to those who didn't dodge the draft even if they didn't believe in it. It takes guts to jump out of a trench, run off of a Higgins boat into three feet of water, or land a helicopter in the jungle all while facing artillery, machine-gun, and small arms fire. It's something I hope I never have to experience.

I have my views on war, violence, death and destruction.

But I must recognize those who are willing to die to protect my right to hold the views that I do.

246

I'm beat. I have spent the last three days adventuring various out-lying areas of Bellingham. I'm climbed a lot, I've hiked a decent amount, and gotten a solid dose of vitamin-D. I feel my face getting that stretchy feeling that usually means a sunburn, so we'll see how it looks in the morning. My left arm has sandstone rash on it from a botched bouldering route. My arms and back hurt a lot, but all the pain is worth the good times that came with it.

I've been thinking a lot lately. I was realizing today, sitting on the beach surrounded by amazing rocks, sand, and seaweed how difficult it's going to be to go home this summer. I've made a lot of really good friends up here, and leaving them all for three months is going to be lame.

Three-ish weeks left of this madness. I love school, I love my friends, I love Bellingham. But since I am spending one more summer in Vancouver, I am so glad that I get to spend it the way I do. More adventure.

Sweet.

243

I've got a tension of some kind. My body is sore, and I know how that feels because I did it to myself. This seems to be a tension of the mind, but it's not stress. I don't know what it is, it just feels strange. Otherwise, I'm stoked to be around, alive, and kickin'. I do, however, wish it was sunny more often.

I was gearing up for the three day weekend until I found out that rain was forecast for this weekend. Man, do I need an adventure. I haven't been outside off campus in probably a week. I was hoping for some hiking and climbing with a friend, but that may not happen. Again.

I am the proud owner of a pair of Chacos and a climbing harness, which I got to use when some friends I made at the climbing wall belayed me (I got to go to the top!), then taught me how to belay. So fun. I'm set and stoked to climb really high stuff this summer.

Yesterday was very full. I am trying to stay away from the Ridge most of the time, and I tend to see more people on north campus if I hang out down there. So, I was away from the room from 9:30-ish up until about 11:00 PM. Which was totally fine, because it wasn't like I was doing nothing. I've gotten a ton of reading done, went to classes, did some hanging out, went to Core, and, the highlight of the night: went to an Associated Students meeting in which the board members approved (with reservations, I might add,) to approve an $8 a quarter raise in the health fee per student. While it's sort of a bummer that students have to pay for this, its totally worth it. It goes toward Crime and Sexual Assault Support (CASAS), Women's Empowerment and Violence Education (WEAVE), and other resources for student on campus that had lost their government funding. These organizations provide counseling for victims of violence and so on, and the additional fee ensures that they have counselors year round (incl. summer if I understand it correctly.) While I hope I never have to refer residents to these resources next year, they are valuable resources that should be available, and it was super cool to be there when the motion passed. Most people won't notice the $8 on their bill anyway, since it either goes straight to their parents or they don't look at the breakdown.

I am going to add here: Western students. Do have ANY idea how much this institution can do for you besides give you a degree in whatever? There's free tea and awesome people to talk to at the Wellness Outreach Center (WOC.) The fine folks at the Career Center will look over resumes, keep you informed on internships, and help you pick what you want to do with your life. If you get overwhelmed with school and life and need someone to "word vomit" all over, go to the Counseling Center.

By the way. I might add that you already pay for all of this anyway in your tuition.

I really just wish I had known all of this before. I remember looking down my breakdown and going "huh...I wonder what this $80 in fees is...oh well."

This evening I proxied at Resident Hall Association (RHA.) I had fun, believe it or not. Everyone was really happy and riled up, which made me more giggly than normal. It's awesome when people point at you and recognize you as the "most excited person they saw all day," or point at you from across the room and say "I love this guy!"

Yeah. I'm stoked on life. I've got a lot of reasons to be as happy as I am.

241

In these last few rainy days, I've had time to reacquaint myself with something I forgot I really enjoyed: reading. Currently, I'm working on Marx's Kapital and Stephan Ambrose's The Wild Blue, which is about B-24 pilots over Europe during the Second World War.

I have noticed, though, that I read things differently now, and specifically Ambrose. I have always enjoyed his writing, and it's the kind of writing that a guy like me can only hope to produce someday. But I've found that a lot of his main points are derived from personal interviews.

"What's wrong with that?," some may ask.

Well, nothing. One of the things we training to be historians learn is to take EVERYTHING with a grain of salt, and personal testimonies and interviews may seem to be a strong source, and they are; until you realize that these interviews are being given some 40-50 years after the events occured. A lot can happen to one's memory within that time frame. Events can be glorified or played down, as well as exaggerated. Names, places, dates, and times can be forgotten or changed. This could be done intentionally or completely by accident. Interviews are funny, because you can talk to five people who were at the same place at the same time and get five different perspectives on an event.

Ambrose builds much of his case on these interviews, including many with George McGovern (yes, the politician.) And while it's fascinating to read these stories, it's all from the perspectives of a limited number of pilots and airmen out of hundreds of thousands who served.

Knowing this has made reading more interesting. It's fun to be able to question what you read and decide if you agree with an author on a particular subject. One example: Ambrose writes that the vast majority of Army Air Force (AAF) airmen were between the ages of 2 and 10 when Limburgh flew across the Pond. He then deduced that this is why all of the men wanted to fly airplanes. I have yet to find his evidence. It's an interesting coincidence, yes, and it's also very possible. But there were many other benefits to flying in the air force, like not having to live in a foxhole with another guy in snow enduring constant shelling and machine gun fire. Hot food, a bed to sleep on. Sweet. Of course, you are also stuck in a giant tin can while flak and explosions burst all around you. Not so sweet.

I've gotten to do some more climbing indoors since it's raining, but I'm ready for another adventure down to the coast for some climbing. Hiking...AH! Must...get...out..side.

240

I have felt very tired all day. I went to bed earlier than normal, and I haven't pushed my body to its limits yet. I'm going to try and get some much-needed climbing in, so hopefully there will be people at the wall I can meet and draw some energy from.

I think it's the rain. It seems more life-sucking now that I've seen the sun for a few days. The strange thing is that it's still quite warm outside. It's still t-shirt weather, except that water is falling from the sky.

Got my midterms back today and they were about what I expected. Did some reading, tried like crazy to find ways to entertain myself, including slacklining in the rain. I've now successfully completed the 360 pivot. I switch feet, but it's still really fun. And this really cool lean-back thing that I picked up from a guy at Esther Short park over the weekend.

I think I'm gonna get a half-inch line here pretty soon. Just for a new challenge. And a harness so I can get some high-lines going.

I'm really crazy.

239

I spent my weekend in Vancouver dealing with the unseasonably scorching heat. While my primary reason for making the trip south was to watch my amazing mother play the piano with an orchestra, I got to see a bunch of my friends, make some new ones (Jenn, Lorrie, and Dan. See! I even remembered their names. Although I'm pretty sure I freaked them out a little bit..) I also was able to ride a bike, walk around barefoot, and make a once-customary midnight-ish run through Muchas Gracias for an Oregon burrito and loud conversation.

I got a lot of "hippy" comments this weekend at church and home. And yet I am unsure on how exactly to define the word "hippy."

I have long-ish hair.

I walk around without shoes most of the time.

I am against war or "premature" deaths of any kind.

I would rather slack line or rock-climb than play basketball or football.

I believe TV and movies are a waste of time and a creation of the bourgoisie to increase profit margins.

I appreciate nature enough to put up a fight against people who want to destroy it.

I believe in the rise of the proletariat.

I am sick of the Bush regime, but I'm also sick of politicians in general.

I don't understand how all are entitled to "liberty," but I can't ride my skateboard on campus.

Certainly other people fit in with these characteristics and yet do not consider themselves hippies. And while I am comfortable with the label, I would like to know what it is that people are going to assume about me if I am referred to in such a way.

I should note that I do not smoke bud. Nor will I ever. That's a bourgeois creation as well.

236

Today was a thousand times better than yesterday. It probably topped out at 70-ish degrees outside with complete bluebird skies. I got up, got lunch, read the newspaper, filmed a movie with my homies for the RA class, then went slacklining, followed by rock climbing on the beach (I finally found a few walls with sandy landings!) I'm now trying to figure out what to do next. I'm taking the train home tomorrow, so I've still got to get ready for that, as well as eat something.

There were a few times in the course of my adventure that I decided it was necessary to remove the flip-flops and barefoot the hike I was taking to the rocks. I'm really really dirty, way more than normal.

And yet I feel it would be a waste of water for me to take a shower, considering I smell fine.

Ya'll.

I think I'm a hippy.

235

I'm writing after having gone through one of my worst days as a student at Western. Choices that I make as a person trying to follow Christ in a world that really could care less have finally brought me into conflict with those I try so desperately to reach, the conflict that Christ himself made known would happen. While I know that I did the right thing, some very hurtful things were said to me, and I have spent the day enduring the arrows of the Evil One, trying with everything I have to extinguish the flames. In some moments I have been able to triumph, in most I have failed, left walking in the Bellingham drizzle feeling utterly alone. I have taken a beating today, and Satan won't let up for as long as I live, let alone this evening.

In a little over two hours, my friend and I will be helping lead Core. This is immensely stressful for me. I was really excited about this yesterday: now I just want to walk in the woods with friends that emit positive energy while I trudge through this day feeling inadequate.

But my feelings of inadequacy and insecurity are a lie of the Devil! I'm amazing! Fearfully and wonderfully made! The God of the Angel Armies loves me enough to send his son to this sinful Earth to die the death of a criminal on my behalf. I have no choice but to turn to him for help, and I am called to do no less.

I will praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
You are who you are
no matter where I am
And every tear I've cried
you hold in your hands
You've never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm.

232

Thanks, mom, for being amazing. Just thought I'd say that first.

Second, today was fun. I got to go to church at the time I wanted to go, revise my paper, make more friends, hang out at the rock wall, talk to my parents and chill with a bunch of people I've really connected with over the last few weeks. I get really good vibes from them, not that I don't from everyone else, but we're really ridiculous, an attribute to which I am told I'm a catalyst.

One other thing that's really cool: I really am comfortable with being ridiculous. I walk around without shoes most of the time, slap-five to random folks I come across, and dance and do cartwheels at dinner. It's a lot of fun, and even more fun when people say "Brandon, stop, you're embarrasing yourself." Which really means "Brandon, stop, you're embarrassing me." That is the best feeling ever, when you have control over someone's comfort level like that.

I certainly recognize that there are times to behave certain ways. For example, if I were to do cartwheels down the aisle during my mother's piano performance next weekend, I'm pretty sure that aside from getting to do cartwheels no good can come of it.

But when you're standing in a line to get movie tickets without shoes on and the person you're with turns to you and says "Would you please put your shoes on? It's really gross and embarrassing," I just love that moment where I can smile and say "Nope, I'm good" and just bask in the moment that I control that person's emotions.

Could be bad...

But it's funny :-D

231-GROSS

It's warm here, but cloudy and is threatening rain. Thankfully I've got another day to study up on school stuff, because Monday is midterm day. SICK.

This weekend being Mother's Day, this university pretty much died. In my walk to the library today to work on a paper I saw one person, and there's normally people out and moving by 1 in the afternoon on a Saturday. The weather isn't awesome either, so maybe that has something to do with it.

I feel like I'm having an off-day. I think I know what my issue is, but I can't seem to pin it down completely.

OH. Today was my first day in three days that I had coffee, which proves that I can DEFINITELY function without it. Strange thing is that I felt pretty good until about two hours ago. I guess I crashed. Maybe I need to dump this stuff completely...we'll see what happens.

I'm off to do some exploring to relieve myself of the ever nagging feeling that I really should be studying. I've done a fair amount already, so I feel justified.

Golly, it looks gross outside.

Where are all the people!?

229

As a part of my Resident Advisor class I was mandated to pay for a personality test, specifically the Meyer-Briggs Type Indicator, or the MBTI for short, because everyone loves acronyms. I have so many acronyms floating around in my noggin that I wonder how I remember them all.

So I'm an ENFP: Extraverted-Intutitive-Feeler-Perceiver. I have taken this test before, and when I took it then I was an ESFP, which means I was sensory instead of intuitive. Either way, I'm right on the line in between the two, with a slight inclination toward intuition. I can't say I'm surprised, because I knew I had changed in that area.

Sensors and intuitives basically take in information in different ways. Here's the difference: intuitives tend to take a big picture approach to information, then filling in the gaps with facts and figures. Sensors do things the opposite way: they take in all the little tidbits of information and build up to the big picture using those facts.

I was in class today taking notes and had this in mind. I found myself writing down the main idea, then just listening to the statistics without writing them down, because I've always taken notes this way. That doesn't mean the minute details don't matter, because they do. But they support the big picture, which is what I'm interested in.

The other thing I want to talk about (surely you all know that I'm an extravert) is the clearest segment of my personality. While I did have high scores in Extraversion and Feeling (I make my decisions through compassion and identifying with people. I know. Another shocker,) the most clear segment of my personality was perceiving. This means, simply, that I don't plan things. I don't like schedules because I find them limiting. I want to take life as it comes instead of being overly prepared to deal with every problem that may come up. "P" could also stand for procrastinator :-P.

I've talked a fair amount in this blog about taking life as it comes and how schedules and goals limit life as it was meant to be lived. While I still really enjoy this approach to life, I must apologize to those who want to live life differently than I do. You are living life no less by scheduling it out.

I still like spontanaeity :-D it lets you go outside when it's sunny and get sunburnt while rock climbing shirtless in one of the most beautiful spots I know.

228

Within the course of the last few days, I've come to a realization about myself. It has come about that in more than one case I have been somewhat of the go-to guy in times of crises. So I sit in my broken, no-armed-no-backed rolley chair and I listen intently until they're done talking. Which would mean that it becomes my turn to talk at some point. However, I find myself without words with which to comfort the distressed.

I've never had a girlfriend, and thus I've never had to deal with the termination of a romantic relationship. My parents love eachother and have for more than 23 years, which means there's no divorce that I've had to deal with, and thus no jumping in between homes. I don't really get angry even when provoked, I've never done drugs, and my high school seemed devoid of drama.

And so when it comes time to say "I know what you're going through," I can't, because that would be lying. As a result, what I end up saying is "I don't know what to say. I've never experienced anything like that, and I can't imagine what you're going through."

In some cases this is adequate, because really the person came to talk to me because they knew I would listen. In other cases my response merely makes the situation seem worse. Then they talk some more. I ask questions, then listen to their responses.

I know I'm supposed to love them like Jesus, that I don't have all the answers to life's questions. But I really just have nothing to say. I feel that nothing I can say can make them feel better about their situation.

I know I can't solve every problem, but I at least want to help the person enough to where they can leave the room and feel glad that they came in to spend time with me, even if their problem isn't solved.

On the flip side, some people have been through some pretty lame experiences. I don't have to have gone through them to know that they suck. I just wish I had something more constructive to say to them.

Jesus loves you, this I know / For the Bible tells me so
Little ones to him belong / They are weak, but he is strong

226-RANDOM

Slow down, you're crazy child,
Take the phone off the hook and disappear for awhile.
It's alright, you can afford to lose a day or two.
When will you realize Vienna waits for you?

I love this segment of the Billy Joel song "Vienna." Vienna is a metaphor for the rest of your life, and it's about people that spend their whole life worrying themselves to death about their direction in life, living life like a checklist of things to do. Terrible. At least to me.

This coming from the guy who climbs his body into a hole and hikes until he can't anymore.

Anyway, today is Cinco de Mayo. Which in America is really just an excuse to shoot tequila and eat copious amounts of Mexican food. I used to know what Cinco de Mayo meant. I know it's not the Mexican Independance Day. I seem to recall there being something to do with peasants defeating an invading army, which would have likely been French or Spanish, but I don't know for sure.

I was going to do a post on immigration, but I seem to have forgotten what I was going to say within the course of the last eight hours.

It had something to do with loving people.

224-Gotta Say, I'm a Little Confuzzled...

Upon a reheat of my coffee, I heard a loud *POP* and opened the door to the microwave to find coffee dripping from the ceiling of said appliance...random.

I have done just about nothing today. No, really. I took a rest day. A real Sabbath. Which for me is just about unheard of. I don't know what I think of it, because I mostly just felt tired. I took a nap, read a bunch, cleaned my desk out, listened to the music I wanted to listen to (my roommate is out of town,) and basically just thought about stuff.

Words cannot express the beauty I see when I look out my window. It rained all day. The fog blanketted the hills surrounding the university. I don't remember watching anyone walk past the football field that I can see. But as I finished my chapter of Soviet history, I looked out the window to see the sun hitting the tree tops, the sky turning pink in the fading light. Birds started chirping. Oh my, leaving this place will be hard! I only have a month and a half left, too.

I had one of my moments. One of the times in which I could just forget life and go do whatever I wanted without the concern for money and prior obligations. I have decided I don't really want stuff. I'll hang on to my bass, my guitars, my computer, and my iPod. Maybe I'll keep my truck. Meh. It's just stuff. It'll burn in the end. I still believe the real treasure of this life is centered in God-centered experiences and relationships.

Having a conversation with my friend at breakfast, I was asked what I was going to do when I graduate. It was the coolest thing ever to be able to say "I dunno. I go where I'm led" and actually mean it.

I'm so excited for life! I have no idea where I'll end up. But this next year is going to be AMAZING! I'm so content with life. I've got it made.

223-Kinda Grey

Today was somewhat of a low point in Brandon's spring quarter. I've been riding high for a really long time, so a tiny fluctuation in the amazingness could be counted as a low point. Anyway. I feel like I'm back on top of things. I would, however, like to find some good old fashioned fun tonight that doesn't involve sitting in front of a screen watching a movie.

I found out today that the United States is continuing to blow stuff up. I really struggle with this. Think of it however you want, in terms of U.S. citizens saved, or Somalian's killed. People are still dying.

I learned the other day that the United States develops $1.5 billion in debt a day.

Why can't we stop blowing stuff up and focus on feeding people?

222- Hey! Three Twos, One More Waste of Bandwidth

I know I haven't written too much in the last few days, and that's because not too much has happened. It's been not-raining for the last few days, so I've done a lot of being outside and goofing off. Rock climbing has worn me out and at the moment I'm genuinely tired of it. The last time I felt like this though, I was about to break V2, so I think I'm on the cusp of V3 (difficulty rating of bouldering routes, I think they go to V17...just so you know how terrible at this I am.)

I guess that an update on me would be that while I am having SO much fun this quarter, I'm having to work out some things and make some decisions about my future that I don't really want to make. I'm having to rely on God a TON and just follow where he's taking me, and trust him more than my own feelings and mind. I'll let you know what these things are when I have a more firm idea of what they look like and when I know what's going on with them.

Making friends everywhere. Man, I really love it up here. I'm going to miss it this summer.

I ate three pork carnitas for dinner. Which I shouldn't have done. But when the folks up here make something good, you eat as much as you can.

218 Part II

Pastor Grant Fishbook made an interesting point today. He asked us what sermon we were going to preach this week. We'd like to think that no one elses opinion matters. That may be fine for a non-Christian. But if we Christ followers subscribe to that opinion, we're kidding ourselves. Our reputations and how we live do matter. A lot. We can say we love God all we want, but if our lives and actions don't reflect it, our faith is dead. Alluding to the "vine" analogy, such branches are cut off, thrown into the fire and burned.

This is something that I've had to think a lot about this year. I tend to meet people. Everywhere. And they need to know through my actions and words within the first five minutes of knowing me that I'm a really happy, really outgoing guy. More importantly, I have to reflect Christ to them.

So, I want to preach about love this week. And forgiveness that's only found in Christ. I want people to walk away from me at the rock wall, or my slackline, or whatever, feeling like they met someone that actually gives a hoot about them. And hopefully, they'll see me again, hop on the line, and I can help them know I stand for love in a world that could really care less most of the time.

218-My Body Always Seems to Hurt After the Weekend

So I have some stuff to do. One of these things is a large amount of reading. I don't own the book, or I'd be reading right now. After dinner. I promise. I'll be in the library a very long time. It's not hard reading, actually. It was written by this guy looking for an adventure in the early 1930's, so he decided to relocate to the Soviet Union. I can't say that it was the best idea in the world, but had I been alive in the 1930's with the same ambitions as I do now, I would finish school and then do what he did. Which may have led to my end, but we won't go there.

My brother Evan and friend Simon came up on Friday night. It was a really good time, and it was great having them up here. We played Settlers, which I didn't win, but to me was not about winning. It was about having 5 other people in my room at once and watching them all interact, which isn't something that flies on a normal weekend. Went on a hike the next day, and was really tired from that when we set up a slackline and screwed around in the grass for awhile.

Night came. I crashed.

Church this morning.

Then climbing.

then laundry.

Then this.

My back is sort of sore. I didn't realize that climbing worked the back so much. I am still trying to get my upper arms to equal each other. My right is bigger than my left, which to my in-some-ways-OCD self just isn't cool.

216

I've been climbing, sometimes twice a day, for the last 6-7 days in a row. Goodness, I'm going to hurt myself. And yet I can't stop! I got a route last night that I have been trying the last 3 weeks, so I finally just said "I'm not leaving until I get this one," since they swap out the holds and the routes on that section Saturday. It felt amazing to finish that one.

So it's a hazy, bright morning in Bellingham. It's looking like it's gonna clear up and I'm not gonna take a break today either.

Nothing epic to talk about today. I'm sorry, I feel myself thinking, but I have no idea what about...

214

I really should just stop. Really. One of these days my body is just going to not want to move anymore. And still I have yet to feel direct pain as a result of my activity. So I'm gonna keep going today and see where that takes me.

This quarter is going SO fast. Way faster than I want it to. Six and a half weeks left of school...then I've got to pack up the Chevy and roll on out of here. There's nothing wrong with that, but I'll be anxious to get back up here in early September, even if it is for RA training. Money's gonna be tight FOR SURE. COME ON tax return, I need you buddy!

Can I just say here, though, that I have pretty much felt amazing the last few weeks, with the exception of one or two low points. I'm out having fun, learning cool things (even if my political science class feels like I've been returned to high school due to its formatting,) meeting a ton of really cool people in this really beautiful place. My body is in that constant state of good-sore. Man, Bellingham is RAD.

I think happiness is directly proportional to the amount of sun.

Today I still feel good, but it's kinda gross outside. That's ok though, because yesterday it was about 60 degrees and bluebird.

WOOT.

212

Some of you may know that whatever literature I choose to read tends to fall within the realm of utopian discourse. Novels like 1984 and Farenheit 451 are a few of my favorites. The reason I like them: They take situations that many would consider ideal and switch the perspective around to fit someone who finds the world in which they live utterly terrible.

Such is the argument for a theocracy. I've heard numerous times that the founding fathers of the United States had God in mind when designing our Constitution and that people originally came to this country to worship free from the tyranny of the Anglican church. I don't feel these two aspects of American history are entirely accurate, but that's not my argument. My argument is this: THANK GOODNESS this country isn't a theocracy. And may it never until God takes us home and rebuilds this place.

Some may feel it beneficial to all to make the Bible our Constitution. That's actually what sparked this in my mind. There are people running around these days claiming to fly the flag of Christ that are showing up to funerals of soldiers that were killed in action in Iraq. There may seem to be no harm in this. However, when you're hanging out in the back waving a sign around that says "God Hates Fags," we've got issues. Granted, the Bible that I know exhorts us to love others like Christ loves us and has nothing to do with what these folks are claiming. However, should a theocracy be our chosen form of government here on earth, the government could get behind something like that if they felt it were justified enough.

I'm just saying. It could happen.

But the main issue I take with this is on the issue of corruption. If, theoretically speaking, everyone in the United States was evangelical Christian, Catholic, Muslim, Bahai, what have you. Someone has to be at the top of the ladder leading the country. You may even have a council of some kind. This is beside the point. As long as there is sin in this world, people will make stupid decisions. People let power get to their head, no matter how holy they seem to be, or how holy they try to be. That is human nature.

I had a professor tell me we are all fundamentally good the other day. My mind said an emphatic no. This world seems to have so much to offer, so much that we can see and touch and feel. And that is precisely why God's heaven and New Earth are the only way this could ever work. When all corruption is gone and it's destruction is entirely evident. When God's sent Satan packing and all of his wily ways to the bottom of the freakin' lake of fire.

Under these circumstances, and these circumstances only will a God-honoring theocracy actually work, and only then will everyone actually be ok with it. Imagine that...

Utopia without a dissenting view.


I'm expecting comments on this one, so gimme whatever you've got, I'll do my best to explain my perspective.

A thought on 212, but not the big post to which I referred earlier

I was looking through the online NY Times this morning so I could know what was going on in the world, when I noticed a topic near and dear to my heart right on the front page. Jimmy Carter talking to Hamas.

Ok. A few things come to mind here. Some good, some bad. I'll start with the good, and I have about 10 minutes to communicate this, so I'm sorry if it's unclear.

The good: Jimmy Carter has a history of doing things like this, and while people fling him crap for his foreign policy while he was president, he tried, and I feel like he had something (or someone) working against him. Yeah. I'm a bit of a conspiracy theorist.

I feel bad for the Palestinians, and I think someone needs to advocate their position. Whatever God's plan is in this, they still need love, because he created them and loves them just as much as anyone. I'm glad someone seems to be (I suspect there's some political motive on the part of whichever candidate he is supporting [Obama?] who said at the beginning of his candidacy that he would be open to talks with anyone regardless of affiliation) loving them and interested in what they want.

The bad: I am by no means a fan of George Bush (there, I said it,) but I would like to know under what political authority Carter is acting, and as such what legitimacy his remarks actually have.

Carter is saying that Hamas would agree to the 1967 borders if approved by a vote amongst the Palestinian people.

Question: how does someone organize that? You have (last I checked) two separate Palestinian states as well as Israel itself. And they can't agree on anything anyway. How in the WORLD are you going to cover every (maybe not...) ethnic Palestinian in this vote? And even if you can organize it, what happens if the Palestinian vote doesn't agree with the 1967 borders? You now have an even more emboldened Hamas, working with a "mandate of the people."

Carter was President for awhile. That merit alone means he knows WAY more than I do. He knows what he's doing, but this seriously just looks like election season remarks against the Establishment. My guess is it's political.

I'll post something actually worth reading later today. Hopefully it doesn't amount to wasted bandwidth.

211- The Weekend

I won't lie. I looked at this weeked thinking it would be really boring. Ya know. Things like snow in town tend to put a "damper" (pun intended) on things for guys like me that like to be outside and goof off.

I was wrong. And I was glad I was.

On Friday night, I was really bored until about 8:00, when I found out that I had places to be. I went and hung out at a friend's dorm, then it worked out that a friend from Vancouver came up for the night, so we went and chilled in town. I also introduced him to some of my homies up here, and we made a trip down to the grocery store at 1:00 AM.

Saturday I feel like I didn't do a whole lot, but I don't particularly remember feeling bored. I went and saw a movie called "Forgetting Sarah Marshall," which I shouldn't have gone and seen, which was immediately evident five minutes into the fim. I wouldn't recommend it at all, at least to people that care at all about what goes into their head.

Anyway.

This morning I did some work on a history paper, which I came back to throughout the day in between climbing at the gym with my friend Meagan, meals, and exploring and climbing Larrabee State Park with my friend Juliet. We found a really cool traverse route away from the water a bit so we didn't get the water noise, but it was definitely more relaxing than the rock gym. I love real rocks.

Oh. Here, I must give a shout out to the fine folks at REI. I bought a pair of leather lace-up climbing shoes there about a month and a half ago. I climb just about every day, and the thing with leather shoes is that they tend to stretch. When I bought the things, I kept this in mind, and my feet barely fit in them, and it hurt like crazy to walk. Enter today's experience. I went into REI to see what my options were on getting a pair that fit me, because I had been assured when I bought into REI that they stood behind anything they sold, and that if it wasn't meeting my needs it was a refund or exchange pretty much without question. Come to find out this is lifetime of the object in question. Golden. As a result, without any pestering, I was able exchange my beat up ones to get a pair that fit me and don't stretch as much. So KUDOS for sure. I worked retail for awhile, and that's not something that happens everyday.

Oh. One other thing. Everyone needs to know that Gardettos makes a bag that is entirely rye chips. You have no idea how exciting this is for me. I already had a bag earlier. I seem to recall a conversation where the flavor of the rye chips was thought to be based on the flavor of the items around it. NOPE. They're the same.

Ok. Interesting topic tomorrow. Maybe a bit edgy, and a little controversial, even for me.

Until then. Cheers.

209- Hunger

Remember, I'm not a revolutionary. If the revolution happens, it will happen by itself. Lately, though, I've realized that I have an intense fascination with revolutionary action.

My mother and I were talking awhile ago about what kinds of events spark revolutions.

Hunger was one of them.

Mom told me "Especially if there're mothers involved. There are few things that cause you to do more than the thought of your children starving."

This is exactly what happened to cement the collapse of the Romanov Dynasty in Russia, February of 1917. Women rioting because they couldn't feed their kids.

Let's see where this goes.

208- Nothing Thoughtful Today

So this is something I thought was a good idea that came from another blog I check often. It's basically just list of songs. I listen to them a lot, and they do various things to me, whether they make me want to jump off stuff (in a good way,) fling my hair around, inspire me to think, or just to relax. So if ya'll don't know these songs, look em' up.

Cheers.

1.) "Don't Stop Believin," Journey
2.) "Lifesong," Casting Crowns
3.) "We Didn't Start the Fire," Billy Joel
4.) "Accidentally in Love," Counting Crows
5.) "Blink," Blue Scholars
6.) "Long Road Out of Eden," The Eagles
7.) "Footloose," Kenny Loggins
8.) "How Can I Keep From Singing," Chris Tomlin
9.) "Awakening," Switchfoot
10.) "Mexico," James Taylor
11.) "Open Your Eyes," Snow Patrol
12.) "Light Up the Sky," Yellowcard
13.) "Leningrad," Billy Joel
14.) "The Saints Are Coming," U2 and Green Day

207

As I await dinner and the climbing adventure scheduled for afterwards, I figured I'd put in a word just for the sake of doing so.

I have realized as of late that I don't particularly like being pressured into things. I'm not talking about assignments given to me by my professors, and if I was employed I would gladly do the work placed in front of me by my employer. No. I'm talking about things of the non-mandatory nature such as, playing Spoons. I had this confront me the other night. There is nothing wrong with playing Spoons. However. I was fine with being an observer. Really, I just didn't want to play. Some around the circle were not ok with me not playing. As they implored me to play, stopping short of grabbing me by the arms and yanking me into the circle, my resolve only strengthened.

I have had this come up with numerous things. Going to the movies. Basketball. Halo matches.

Some nights I am ok with just chillin'. Others I may want to go out someplace and do something. Some nights a movie just doesn't sound like fun.

I seem to recall a similar attitude in my father while on Douglass-Adent-Tai family retreats to the beach. He just wanted to sit and read his book. Not go wander around in the sand. Not throw a football around. Not play a card or board game.

He just wanted to sit and read his book.

He didn't mind people asking him to do things. He did mind when people didn't respect his answer. He didn't like having to respond a certain way, especially under duress, in order to shut up whoever was bugging him.

This was fine. It's simply a character trait of his, and my dad is amazing. In fact, once I was old enough to figure it out, this particular trait worked in my favor much of the time. I am not exactly a fan of the beach, so I didn't mind just because it gave me an excuse to not go to the beach. I didn't realize I was like this as well until I started to get heated when someone wouldn't leave me alone.

"Nope. I'm hiking."

"Why don't you want to go to the movies with us, Brandon?"

"Because I want to hike."

"But I heard this movie is REALLY good and we REALLY want you to come. Give me a reason you won't go."

"OK. FINE. I'll give you three. 1.) I won't know you better at all after I've spent $10 to sit through 2 hours of mind-numbing, brainwashing, typical Hollywood-know-nothing media. 2.) I don't have $10, nor am I willing to waste two hours of my life pretending that I want to be in a movie theater. 3). I'm going hiking."

"Ok, whatever. You're such a party pooper." (They say this thinking they're going to change my mind, when really, I'm just glad they've stopped bugging me.)

Hint. If you've had to pull out the name calling, you've already lost. So don't go there. Someone who knows me can generally tell when my resolve is going to break, so they know when to quit and when to keep going. I generally do this weird wincy-teeth clench thing.

I am not by any means being anti-social in not accepting your offers for activity. By all means, keep asking me to do things. I love being with people, and I would rather be thought of than not. Just know that asking me twelve times isn't going to change my mind if I am not into a particular activity.

I just thought I'd make ya'll aware that I'm aware of this tendency. I don't like how I deal with it all the time, because I could certainly be more tactful and loving at times. I'll work on it. In the mean time, just know that it's nothing against you should I decline an invitation.

There. That was more involved than I thought it would be.

A topic is burning, and I've been formulating for about the last week, and I'm about ready to express it. Look for it within the next few days.

purely experimental extra 206 written on 207

check this out. It's Blanchard Mountain's "don't log me" website. I really just wanted to see if I could create a hyperlink without the full link written out.

I'm wiped out today. I want to thank the new readers who have commented. Keep em' coming. I'm really glad that ya'll think enough of this to spend time reading what a goof-ball 21 year old college kid has to say about the world as he sees it.

Cheers.

Brandon

206

So I got online this morning to do email and goof off as my roommate sleeps 10 ft away from me. It's 11:25, which means he really should be awake.

Anyway.

I can't remember if I've ever posted anything pertaining to my stance on the environment, so I'll start with that.

I love trees, the forest, and the mountains. I think it's a shame that some people can't grasp the beauty of a sunset, crave the serenity of a forest, the humbling feeling that comes with standing at the top of a craggy 1000 ft cliff. I believe nature was one of God's gifts to his children. Hey, that's us! And I think it's a bummer that we don't put more emphasis on preserving that natural beauty. So, to answer your question, yes, I hug trees. However, I've not about to put a hammock up there with a bullhorn and shout obscenities at anyone that tries to cut me down. I recognize that as a nation, we need lumber. It's a basic material need. Unfortunate, I know, but that's how it is.

So my basic idea is preserve nature as much as you can without hurting anyone. I myself have some work to do to lessen my impact on creation, and I plan for this summer is to drive as LITTLE as possible. This may involve public transportation, riding my bike everywhere, and so on, but it'll make me healthier, and my parents are paying into public transportation anyway, so I may as well use it.

The problem is where to draw the line.

G-Dub (my favorite name for our president,) has put off adopting the Kyoto Protocol because it would effect the United States economy too much (what does that tell you? We've got an economy that depends largely for it's pollution to exist.) This could hurt people's lives a lot. But if this whole global warming thing is legit (I tend to ere on the "we have to be effecting the climate somehow" side, but I'm not at all a climatologist so I won't pretend to know what's going on. Al Gore drives me nuts, too,) it's going to effect their lives a whole lot more long term if the climate change doesn't favor the production of oranges in Florida. Or if the fishing industry tanks (pun intended) because the temperature of the ocean water changes, thus killing more fish, that's going to result in the layoffs of fisherman, the reluctance of big companies to invest in fishing boats, and for the normal family that just likes to eat fish (Mom makes good fish. Fish in the dining hall has to be fake,) it's going to drive prices up, so grocery stores won't sell as much, so they won't stock as much, and SO-ON-AND-SO-FORTH as I fondly remember my Grammie Adent saying.

Or we could just be careful how much gas we use, what we dump into the ocean, how many trees we cut down, and what we release into the air. Make sense?

Ya'll may have heard me say "I'm not a revolutionary. The revolution, if it happens, will happen on it's own." Today, I wanted to make an impact and actually do something for Washington. The mountain containing miles of trails and home to places like the Oyster Dome and the Bat Caves (really COOL rocks!) known as Blanchard Mountain is slated to be logged soon. For some dude in Olympia (or wherever) who has never been up there and seen the San Juans from 2000 ft on a clear sunny day, that may mean nothing but profits, but to me it means the loss and destruction of the natural beauty found there. The plan to to put a network of logging roads throughout the mountain, and it's perfectly legal because it's not a part of nearby Larrabee State Park or a part of the Chuckanut trail system.

However, it's Washington State land, and as a citizen of Washington State I have a right to protest the destruction of these trails. It looks like the logging is gonna happen anyway, but it's worth a shot, right? Someones secretary will read my letter, then toss it into the ol' "circular filing cabinet." Then they'll write some bull-crap letter telling me how much they appreciate my input on this issue, but the logging will continue as planned.

But at least I'll be able to say I did something about it.

Day 204, written on 205

The weekend is drawing to a close.

I spent Saturday, which was gorgeous, by the way, hiking with a friend in the Chuckanuts up to Raptor Ridge, to which I have been probably four times, but I love it each time I'm there. It's different hiking with someone. It doesn't seem to take as long to get anywhere, and it was way easier to make it up the massive mile-long hill coming up from the trailhead than just by myself. I actually sort of felt like a wimp, because I was hiking with a girl who had been backpacking with her family since forever.

Saturday night I skateboarded a while, but then came back to the room, played guitar, hung out with friends and watched Platoon, a movie about the Vietnam War. It's great if you like war movies and know that they don't accurately show what happened, but not great if you don't particularly like violence or human rights violations and tend to take people's word for things. The film really showed how much the media can influence someone's feeling on a war about which they previously knew nothing. It seemed like we only made it about half hour into the movie before people were asking "Wow, this is terrible, what were we even there for?!" Samuel Barber's Adagio for Strings provided a nice backdrop to Willem Dafoe (who was seemingly the only soldier with a conscience) being shot up by the North Vietnamese Army.
Anyway. Bedtime around 2 AM.

Woke up this morning to a moist ground. Lame. "Wet rocks. Rock climbing is out" I told myself as I drove to church. "Good. Maybe I'll actually get something done."

Driving back from church, I noticed that everything was dry. I called Meagan, and rock climbing was back in. We went down to Larrabee and explored a bit, then settled on a nice big boulder with a traverse route (moving sideways across the rock instead of upwards) that was about ten feet away from the water. After attempting the same route for about an hour (real rock doesn't get boring the way plastic rocks do) we finally called it quits, bone tired and holding each other accountable to resting tomorrow no matter the weather. I'm gonna have to get a few more bandanas though, my red one is feeling iffy to wear every day.

Dinner, Batman Begins, guitar, bass, and journaling. I am currently sitting in front of my computer at 12:30 AM eating cookie dough with a spoon and thinking about sleeping while laughing hysterically at a picture into which Peter photoshopped Robbie's face.

Oh My.

Good night.

202

I climbed my first real rocks today. I didn't really have that much happen besides that. I was up at about 7 to take my friend Megan to the train station.

Went to Starbucks to study, read the paper and have coffee. It was a good way to start the morning.

Class. Went to the rock wall, then spontaneously decided with my friend Meagan (different friend) to go climb real rocks up on Sehome hill. I liked it so much that after slackline (on which I destroyed myself by taking a six foot shot to the hip and catching the line with my calf on the way down on another occasion.) We went to Larrabee State Park in search of rocks to climb. It was a blast! found some really cool formations and discovered another way to meet with God in nature.

SICK. I posted a few pictures.

That's basically it.

200! Part II

I was in my small group today for Core. We were discussing Acts, which, for those of you who don't know, I point to for validation of some of my Marxist beliefs. I, being the person that I am, pointed out somesuch thing in a verse that said something about members of the early church sharing everything and doing so willingly, with one heart and mind.

Everyone kind of chuckled and said "I knew you were gonna say something like that."

Someone contested me, someone who had obviously never read Marx and didn't know that Marx envisioned a society in which this willful sharing of property occured.

Thanks, Lenin and Stalin, for wrecking utopia. You've given the world a distorted view of communism that no one in their right mind can support.

:-D

Cheers

200!

For the two-hundredth post, I've decided to talk about some political stuff. So if you don't care, you can deal with it, or you can not read. Your choice.

There are some things that can't go on being ignored. And there certainly are some attrocities for which people, or governments, should NEVER be rewarded.

In western Sudan, in a region known as Darfur, centuries-old ethnic and tribal divisions have bubbled to the surface with acts referred to by our own President of the United States as "the g-word": genocide. Do you know how hard-core it is to accuse someone of genocide? Imagine the implications! You don't say "the g-word" unless you've got evidence. Solid evidence. Such things deter most countries in our modern times to do things they ordinarily would not, such as refusing to do business regardless of the resource which it chooses to extract. However, China has chosen to ignore the atrocities of the Sudanese government and instead invested in the African nation, building things like roads and means to extract the oil with which Sudan was blessed in exchange for the oil China needs to fuel it's economy (it is shifting to oil from coal. Gas prices aren't goin' down, folks.) Action has been attempted at the international level in the United Nations Security Council. However, China holds veto power as a P5 member (I'll explain this to anyone who cares) and refuses to sanction Sudan or allow the UN peace keepers into the country without Sudanese consent.

The Three Gorges Dam is to be the largest hydroelectric power station in the world when it becomes fully operational in 2011. However, 1.5 million Chinese landowners and citizens have had to be relocated due to the subsequent flooding in the region. Oh. And arable land is PRIME real estate in China. It comprises 10-ish% of Chinas land, and the food produced is somehow enough to feed over 1 billion people. The land that has been flooded is a part of that arable land

An economy run largely run on coal has polluted the air.

Then there's the whole Tibet thing, which I don't fully understand, so I won't pretend to. WHat I do know is that Tibetans are a people who have been long oppressed by the Chinese government, who still refuse to grant the Tibetans autonomy.

Not to mention the persecuted church (on which I also have no statistics and don't really want to take the time to dig them up.)

So what does the U.S. as one of the most powerful countries in the world do? We'll be at the Olympics. No sweat. As long as China and the U.S. continue to do business, there's no debate.

I'm over-simplifying this, but there really does come a point when we have to do something. I don't have all the answers. But when the whole WORLD recognizes something is wrong, why are we legitimizing China's actions? Economic gain. What else is new.

People have always been trying to douse the Olympic torch, but it's never been publicized like this before. I won't watch the Olympics anyway. But for once, I hope they succeed in putting out the Olympic flame. I just wish G.W. had the guts to make some sort of stand against China in this situation. I think it would hurt economically, but it won't happen, right?

So I can ignore the reprocussions of that which won't take place.

199

Climbing. I know that this must being getting old by now, but it's become one of my passions within the last few weeks, so I like talking about it.

It is nice to say that I can finally climb worth anything now. I'm still not good, but I've been able to get several routes that have taunted me for the last week.

However.

I notice that while my body is under the strain of clinging on to a hold barely large enough to fit my fingertips while trying to yank myself from under an overhang to another hold of a similar size, I tend to swear. Usually the "d-word" or the "s-word." "Junk" is another one, but that's not necessarily a curse word. This bugs me for a few reasons.

1.) I can't stop doing it, and I think that the things which we do under stress reflect our hearts more than when we have everything under control.

2.) It makes pulling myself up to the next hold easier, thus reducing my incentive to quit saying these things.

All the while, I can't help but think: who decided which words were bad and why? How is mumbling "s--t" under my breath when my arms are screaming at me to let up worse than calling someone an idiot and genuinely meaning what I say? It's not hurting anyone, and it makes me feel better.

Theoretically, it may help to call on God in that moment, but at that point, my arms REALLY hurt, and my focus is on the next hold, rather than on genuinely asking for God's help. I suppose I'm not sure I can sincerely say a prayer in 1.6 seconds. Or whether God would actually strengthen my body just so I could have the satisfaction of finishing a route I've been trying for a week.

I feel myself trying to rationalize it, but that just isn't going to cut it. Because what happens if Brandon is guiding a raft down the Snake River this summer with ten (or however many) middle schoolers on his raft, things get tight negotiating a path down the river, and I let fly with one of my words? Not exactly the best spot to be in, especially because as a Christian I am called to be different than the world.

Still.

Who decided which words were bad? I was raised that way. I don't think most people question things like that. It's what, however many generations of not saying this word. That's how we're socialized.

I'm not trying to justify it (yes I am, I think to myself,) but it's a good question. Many words today, one of which is CRAP, used to be considered one of these words. It's not anymore. Unless you talk to older people who still think it is. But as a result, we just don;t say it when we're around them. I can;t remember if I've ever said "crap" around my Grammie Adent.

I say it around my Grandpa Douglass.

Because he says it himself.

197

This morning was really hard.

I rose from my blankets out of obligation rather than joy and anticipation of the day to come. Not exactly the way to start the day. Church was a bit of a chore, which blows, because it shouldn't be. The pastor said some things that made me think, but mostly in the way that I didn't want to. Ways like "When's this guy gonna be done talking?" and "I'm not sure I agree with what you just said. Especially because you didn't show me any scripture to assure me that you didn't talk off the top of your head." I remember statistics, but not the points they were intended to prove. He spoke with a passion that scared me more than excited me. I was glad to not have to listen to him talk anymore.

So that would be my morning.

Got back and embarked on a two hour journey to the College Store, Rite Aid, REI, and Haggen, albeit mostly out of boredom. I walked around looking at backpacks, waterbottles, bikes, socks, webbing, rope, and the vast assortment of climbing gear. I've definitely got to pick cheaper hobbies. Getting into rock climbing is rough on the budget. Harness: at least $50. 60 m of climbing rope: $207. Carabiners: at least $6 a piece. Even if I want to avoid all that and just boulder (climbing generally below 15 ft without a harness or gear) all the time, I could just buy a crash pad, which is still right around $150-200. *sigh* If only our bodies could take 1500 foot falls and walk away every time. I did walk out of the store with a bandana to keep my hair out of my eyes while hiking and climbings so I could not cover my whole head with a hat. No. I know what you're thinking. I will not get a haircut. It will take more than hair in my eyes to make me do that.

Otherwise, I bought my other textbook *eek* and wandered around Haggen killing time with Peter. I'm doing pretty well at pinching pennies this quarter. It's all about rationing things. Not eating at will. So on and so forth. I will say though, I am SO SICK of dining hall food. Words cannot express this sentiment to those who have not themselves felt it.

I'm thinking of making coffee, since I have lots of that, but I'm not thinking I want a buzz at 9:30 in the evening. So I'll probably skip that one.

Oh. Found out I got a jury summons. Stupid. Oop. Did I say that? Ok, well it's only because it gives me one more thing to worry about. I also got one a little under a year ago, and it irritates me to think that they've got me on some sort of stupid schedule. They can say it's random. Bull crap. I wasn't born yesterday. My last name starts with AD. I've been first on the list for everything for as long as I can remember. I sat in the left front corner for every elementary school class because the teacher was too lazy to create a seating chart. I went first for every class presentation. My name is the first on the roll-call, which means that if I'm absent, the teacher immediately knows it was me. It's a conspiracy. Doggone it.

I guess that doesn't explain why my mom hasn't ever gotten called for jury duty.

But it seems like my Grammie Adent always has jury duty.

Yes. My argument does have validity.

I promise.

I Screwed Yesterday Up...Today is 195

Journey of Desire. The time has come for me to tell you what I thought. I literally finished three minutes ago and I have a lot on my mind about it. Keep in mind that I do not review books, so try not to dislike me too much if you have read this and disagree with me. I am also condensing 212 pages of text into four paragraphs, which by no means does the work justice, but I don't want to re-write the book either.

First, a general overview. It was written by John Elderidge, whom I suppose is a well known counselor and author. This book is set up in somewhat philosophical terms. He banks a lot on such writers/ thinkers as Pascal, T.S. Eliot, and C.S. Lewis, but he did a pretty good job of keeping his sources diversified. He also relied a TON on scripture, which was awesome, and it's interesting to read what people get from things that I may not pick up on.

Topic-wise, it's about...well...desire. The longings that each of us have as a result of whatever circumstances. A fair amount of time, about 3/4 of the book, is spent showing that desire is God-given, and shouldn't be fought like most people have learned to do since we often get discouraged by having our hopes thwarted by the world, or even God himself. Many people find "imposters," as Elderidge calls them, to fulfill these desires. For example, if a man wants intimacy, he could obviously turn to something like pornography and other types of sexual sin to feel the void that a lack of intimacy has left in his life. This is made pretty clear throughout the book, so there isn't any sort of confusion following this.

The whole point is that it's OK to have these desires. God gave them to us for a reason, and although we realize that due to the Fall as described in Genesis our attaining perfect life is just not going to happen, it's ok to pursue these desires, as long as the God-given desires do not take precedence over God himself. Elderidge ultimately comes to the conclusion that if we surrender our desires to God, he'll take you places you may not expect that may be ABOVE your desires. There's definitely an element of eternal perspective in this mixed in, knowing that following Christ is eventually going to mean paradise for eternity.

I'm a little shaky on the conclusion to which Elderidge comes, and to be honest I felt a little gyped, considering he told me something that I feel I already knew and have been told many times, though I am not sure I follow all the time. Through the whole thing, I felt like he was saying things I really identified with, and I'm thinking "Yeah! That's ME! Tell me what to do about it." And he did. And I didn't feel like I learned anything through his conclusion.

While I was a little bummed with his conclusion, I was really glad that I read this book. It helped me think. I basically have two HUGE desires for my life.

1.) Adventure. I need to see new things, to travel the world snowboarding, climbing, meeting new and different people. This is rather unrealistic due to monetary circumastances, I realize, but it's what I want. Badly. As much as I love Bellingham and can tolerate Vancouver and the Portland area, I will go crazy if I'm here forever.

2.) A girl with whom I can share my adventure. I just to think a golden retriever named Jasper and a Chevy full of gear would be all I needed to see this country. No. If I have to go through life without a wife, I will go crazy. There's no sense in denying this anymore.

SO. Thanks to some underlining that had been done (thanks, Mom. There were actually some points in the book that I wanted to break out my highlighter, which I decided against because I didn't want to wreck your book...) I was able to derive that a main point Elderidge was trying to make was "surrender." Not not caring. Nor was he trying to suggest giving up hope for something better. It's giving your desires to God, putting them in his hands, and watching him work with them, going where he takes you.

I can do that. I think. It's hard though.

There was one point at which I was slightly confused. Elderidge talked quite a bit about relationships and how many of us have given up hope of ever having one that works out the way it was designed to (I have now taken myself out of this category. I can't remember if I explicitly said that I was ever in it. I think it's day #169 or something that I talk about this in greater detail.) Of course, the author takes this moment to talk about sex and what it means, being a metaphor of eternal union with God (which kind of creeps me out in ways that I'll be happy to indulge within the privacy of an email.) It didn't seem to add to his main point.

Side note: while this didn't necessarily make sense to me, I have to say that I get this image of heaven being sort of an eternal worship service. Which...gonna be honest...sounds REALLY boring. I want to do things like go fast, climb things, jump off stuff, and so on without the side effect of getting hurt and aching all the time. I have visions of snapping my broken bones back into place and laughing hysterically at the fall I just took from 1500 feet climbing some crazy rock face without a harness. Who knows what heaven will be like. Anyway, the author brings this up, but doesn't really say anything to say it's not as boring as it sounds, probably because he's never been there and none of his friends who have have bothered report back (for good reason.) I was glad that he did mention it, but I had hoped he would talk more about it. Anyway.

That's a jumble of conclusions I came to. I don't know that I would recommend it highly as previously mentioned, but I would recommend it. It took the place of Mein Kampf in my reading, so now I should probably read the rest of that as well as my textbooks. Awww man!

Hopefully I can hike tomorrow.

Cheers.

193 I Think...

This morning I found myself awake a little later than expected: 10:30 AM. This isn't too late I suppose, but I thought I would wake up a bit earlier. Anyway.

Headed straight to the gym to get my rock on. I have come to the realization that I can't climb anything. Like. At all. I've lost all the endurance I had and can't climb anything above a V0 (basically the lowest climbing level) and I was able to get V1s and V2s in Portland over break. My friend tells me I'm about to break a V1 and to just be patient. Yeah, well, tomorrow I have to rest, because my body hurts.

I went from the rock wall to lunch, then down to slackline for about an hour and half. I made a few new friends and had a lot of fun doing that.

Class time: which consists of two different class settings. One is the large group meeting and lecture, the other is a small group discussion time. I met the small group today, which was super fun. It's going to be a really cool group, and I laughed a lot.

This was pretty much my day. Now is the point where I sit in my room and think about all the people I could have said hi to and didn't, or all the conversations I could have started.

I thought a lot about the book I mentioned in an earlier post, The Journey of Desire. I read a segment last night that made me think like crazy. Well. A few segments. I'll outline them later. I'm about halfway done. Lemme tell ya, I'm going to have some thoughts. I am going to go out on a limb and tentatively recommend this book highly. It's got a lot of things I see myself in.

193- Sunshine Brings Out My Outgoing

All I need to do to be reminded that I'm an extravert is watch my attitude towards other change when the sun comes out. I have been making extra efforts to meet people in the last few days, and I'm convinced it's the sun. When it's t-shirt weather, I am just a happier person and care more about meeting people.

Something else. There is a terrible element to awesome weather: the football team practices at about 6 AM. This means I hear team cheers, grunting, screaming, clapping, whistles blowing, and so on and so forth. I should gripe, but I don't know who to gripe to, because it won't change anything.

I have been to all of my classes at this point. I have decided that I've got it good this quarter. My Soviet history course is going to be AMAZING. The prof knows her stuff, has a great way of interacting with students, and a very dry sense of humor which I find highly entertaining in a professor. She reminds me of my first history professor, Dr. Katherine Sadler at Clark College in Vancouver, WA.

Class #2, Intro to International Relations, will be interesting. It's definitely something I identify with. I was a little irked when the professor said that we'd be reading the New York Times for all of our news. While I agree with the publication choice, I would rather read something else in ADDITION TO the New York Times. Everything has a bias, and NY Times is no less biased than anything else. Christian Science Moniter is actually pretty good too, though I am not as experienced in their ways and refuse to believe the words of their founder, Mary Baker Eddy. In addition to this irksome attribute of the class, there was also this simple realization that PoliSci 271 is DEFINITELY a GUR class, as well as a pre-req for anything political science, which I need to minor in the subject. Such. Freshmen. I know this shouldn't irritate me as much as it did, but when you're used to following the syllabus with the assumption that the professor knew what they were mandating with regard to the course assignments, you generally don't question their words or challenge their course requirements. When told to read the "A" Section of the newspaper everyday, a good question would NOT be "The 'A' Section is kind of lengthy, what specifically do you want us to read?" I got the feeling most people thought it would just be an easy GUR, and were bummed out when they found out they actually had to work for it.

The RA class. Yeah. Um. I don't know how good the class itself will be. But the people in it are AWESOME. As mentioned, and to anyone who doubted it, the person who's words you are now reading (whether you're reading is a good or a bad thing has yet to be determined) is an extravert. To the max. So. Throw him in a room with a bunch of extraverts and see what happens. HE DOESN'T SHUT UP. I tried really hard to meet as many people as I could and talked to as many people who would talk to me. Yeah. It was fun.

My back itches.

So, today was an interesting day. It was a lot of fun for the most part. However, there was one particular segment of which was mildly awkward. A middle aged man was holding up a giant sign in Red Square (brick courtyard in the middle of campus) that read "God is Angry at Sinners" and shouting various other things. Oh boy. Surrounding him was a crowd of students asking him questions and basically mocking him.

Dilemma for Brandon. As a Christian, how do I deal with this? I am a firm believer that while it may work sometimes, there are better ways to talk to people about God than to carry a confrontational sign like that. I would rather draw people to Christ by talking about things like love, forgiveness, and living these things out to the best of my ability, knowing the whole time that I'm still a sinner and don't deserve the grace that only God can give. I do my best to answer the hard questions that people have about my beliefs, and if I don't know, I'll tell my friend I don't know the answer to their question with the belief that it's better to be honest than make up some kind of bullcrap to avoid being vulnerable. My suitemate said that he asked one of the sign carriers questions at one point, and the guy was just blowing off questions he couldn't answer, telling his inquirers "Nope, you're wrong. Penalty box."

On the other hand, it should generally be assumed that this guy was my brother in Christ. That's serious business. Option #1: I could distance myself from the situation and play it safe (this is the one I chose when I heard the verbal abuse this guy was taking.) Option #2: Jump in and help. "Help what?" I asked myself. I can talk to people one-on-one and be relational, because that's my strong side (I was reminded of Moses and him saying he wasn't qualified to talk to Pharoah as I wrote this.) But these students were riled-up-mad at this guy, and I could see why. He was yelling at them. He was coming into people's lives, of which he knew nothing, and telling them the were going to hell if they kept up what they were doing.

I am not sure if I'm satisfied with the decision I made. Maybe next time I'll play it off differently.

I had a revalation. I really wish there was a footnote option for these things. It would be so much more helpful to the reader than parentheses. So if anyone actually reads this and knows if you can add footnotes let me know. I would like the information.

Cheers.